"Nrevyw backwards . . . is wyvern! Our substitute teacher is a wyvern, and he's been killing the students to feed his young!"
The surprising part is that it isn't a disguised wyvern. It's just hovering there, eating people. But then you have to make the rest of the movie. Twists just don't get you very far.
Thursday, June 9, 2022
Nostalgia Corner
Does anyone remember E3? Boy, was it ever terrible. I think there's merit in piling up all as much terrible stuff into one event in the year though, much as Christmas is the one time of year you can have the most gauche house decorations imaginable. Sometimes you just gotta let the demons out.
Wednesday, June 8, 2022
How to Level Up Your Story
Tank? Supertank.
King? Superking.
Mangonel? Supermangonel.
Cilious? Supercilious.
Always remember. Your audience won't know how great everything is unless you say so.
King? Superking.
Mangonel? Supermangonel.
Cilious? Supercilious.
Always remember. Your audience won't know how great everything is unless you say so.
Tuesday, June 7, 2022
Monday, June 6, 2022
The Third Party to Negotiations
Shaedri was crying, which was not too blameworthy given his age, his uncle Dnaegri allowed. That was the limit of his leniency however. He decided to take the boy in hand.
"Nephew. For what reason are you crying? Whatever the problem is, fix it," he said with the full force of age and relation. "That dumb Beuric! I'll never play with him again! I hate him forever!" Shaedri said something of the sort, though his sniffles made deciphering hard.
Dnaegri knew nothing about any Beuric and did not care to learn, but his nephew's complaint reminded him of a story from long ago. "Nephew. This is something you ought to hear." He sat down and arranged his clothes and his beard for comfort. Shaedri sat too. Even at his age, he was wise enough to quiet down and listen at times.
"Long ago, there were two countries called Foirely and Storoddia. They argued over borders, feuded over trade, and raided each other any time the young men thought their prospects were dim. The more prudent on either side tried to bring the two countries together and make some lasting peace, but the thing was impossible. In the end, they managed a new kind of treaty that impressed the governments of both countries with its novelty. That was the non-cooperation pact. Representatives signed the instrument and swore great oaths to keep the terms.
"You might not think it, but once they agreed to that, most of the fire went out of the inferno along the border. It seems once everyone knew where everyone else stood, they could settle down and worry about their own business. Relations went from hot to cool and even started to warm the other way. There was more trade, more international ventures, and more support between the two when either one was invaded by neighbors they still hated. The more prudent looked forward to a friendlier new age."
"That's when the earthquakes and floods began. The tornadoes came next. Rains of fire and poison emptied cities overnight. The gods by whom they had sworn inflicted the punishment they deserved for breaking their oaths. Within a year, neither Foirely nor Storoddia any longer existed. Their lands were taken by countries that kept their word when it was given. So remember, nephew. Either you must reconcile with Beuric or be his enemy, but I don't want to hear any of theses wishy-washy claims that will be retracted an hour later. Understand?"
Shaedri nodded, which did not at all mean he truly understood. That was not too blameworthy, given his age.
Finis
"Nephew. For what reason are you crying? Whatever the problem is, fix it," he said with the full force of age and relation. "That dumb Beuric! I'll never play with him again! I hate him forever!" Shaedri said something of the sort, though his sniffles made deciphering hard.
Dnaegri knew nothing about any Beuric and did not care to learn, but his nephew's complaint reminded him of a story from long ago. "Nephew. This is something you ought to hear." He sat down and arranged his clothes and his beard for comfort. Shaedri sat too. Even at his age, he was wise enough to quiet down and listen at times.
"Long ago, there were two countries called Foirely and Storoddia. They argued over borders, feuded over trade, and raided each other any time the young men thought their prospects were dim. The more prudent on either side tried to bring the two countries together and make some lasting peace, but the thing was impossible. In the end, they managed a new kind of treaty that impressed the governments of both countries with its novelty. That was the non-cooperation pact. Representatives signed the instrument and swore great oaths to keep the terms.
"You might not think it, but once they agreed to that, most of the fire went out of the inferno along the border. It seems once everyone knew where everyone else stood, they could settle down and worry about their own business. Relations went from hot to cool and even started to warm the other way. There was more trade, more international ventures, and more support between the two when either one was invaded by neighbors they still hated. The more prudent looked forward to a friendlier new age."
"That's when the earthquakes and floods began. The tornadoes came next. Rains of fire and poison emptied cities overnight. The gods by whom they had sworn inflicted the punishment they deserved for breaking their oaths. Within a year, neither Foirely nor Storoddia any longer existed. Their lands were taken by countries that kept their word when it was given. So remember, nephew. Either you must reconcile with Beuric or be his enemy, but I don't want to hear any of theses wishy-washy claims that will be retracted an hour later. Understand?"
Shaedri nodded, which did not at all mean he truly understood. That was not too blameworthy, given his age.
Finis
Saturday, June 4, 2022
Friday, June 3, 2022
Thursday, June 2, 2022
A Question to Diablo Lore Experts
Wouldn't Diablo being immortal cause a lot of problems? Lootwise if nothing else. The plot might be a little unsatisfying as well. There's a reason there isn't a Tuck Everlasting game, and I imagine this is it.
Wednesday, June 1, 2022
History Corner
Did you know . . . that Charlemagne's thing wasn't the Holy Roman Empire? That came later. Also, Charlemagne is a dumb name to call him, but I guess we're stuck with it.
Addendum
And then you add in container shipping and the whole thing becomes unsalvageable. Which is a big problem with container shipping. You're gonna want to salvage those containers.
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