The Second Accord

Nobody was quite sure what to call the celebration, but that one should be held was a matter of galactic consensus. Referring to "peace" seemed inappropriate since there had never been a war; indeed, the determination of every analyst and computation on both sides that there never would be was what prompted the present relief. Till the moment itself, none could be honest in claiming he knew whether an encounter between intelligent species would result in the extermination of one as many predicted against the theories of approximately as many.
The formal ceremony to confirm eternal non-agression took place in a space installation constructed for that occasion, a trifling endeavor for a pair of interstellar civilizations. Numerous heads of state attended (the investigations following first contact provided another point of reassurance in that neither species had united into a single nation, a cause of anxiety). Lesser politicians considered themselves either lucky to be invited or else took it as a portent of a continued rise, but as for the deal-makers whom few of the public knew for all that everyone there did, they regarded their inclusion as nothing exceptional. A smattering of celebrities enlivened the event, less from their charm and more from the attempts of either species to explain the sources of their fame.
That procedure as well as much additional conversation impinged on the main disappointment of the historic encounter. Just as the two species had no cause for conflict, neither did they have any for less-violent intercourse.
"This music, I am sorry to say, is discordant to my human ears."
"Your 'pineapple' is not displeasing in shape, but it is quite inedible for us."
"Humor barely survives differences in language. I am unsurprised that none of yours makes it across."
"I have no reason to denigrate your archery, nor any to prefer it over our own."
"I expect you have no culinary use for this garlic. It is only a shame you have no vampires!"
Amid laughs, the other party requested an explanation, out of politeness merely until he heard it.
"Those exist among you?"
"They do. It was once thought they were fiction, but the fact has become unpleasantly evident. There is some speculation that colonization of the moon has led to an increase in their power and numbers."
"How curious that we have a similar monster! It can transfix a man with its horrible eye before feeding." "That is, it can transfix a man of your species. Is that not so? Likewise for ours, I believe."
"An experiment does suggest itself."
Vampires and other unsavory creatures had cause to lament the swift creation of the monster hunter exchange program.
Finis

The Third Party to Negotiations

Shaedri was crying, which was not too blameworthy given his age, his uncle Dnaegri allowed. That was the limit of his leniency however. He decided to take the boy in hand.
"Nephew. For what reason are you crying? Whatever the problem is, fix it," he said with the full force of age and relation. "That dumb Beuric! I'll never play with him again! I hate him forever!" Shaedri said something of the sort, though his sniffles made deciphering hard.
Dnaegri knew nothing about any Beuric and did not care to learn, but his nephew's complaint reminded him of a story from long ago. "Nephew. This is something you ought to hear." He sat down and arranged his clothes and his beard for comfort. Shaedri sat too. Even at his age, he was wise enough to quiet down and listen at times.
"Long ago, there were two countries called Foirely and Storoddia. They argued over borders, feuded over trade, and raided each other any time the young men thought their prospects were dim. The more prudent on either side tried to bring the two countries together and make some lasting peace, but the thing was impossible. In the end, they managed a new kind of treaty that impressed the governments of both countries with its novelty. That was the non-cooperation pact. Representatives signed the instrument and swore great oaths to keep the terms.
"You might not think it, but once they agreed to that, most of the fire went out of the inferno along the border. It seems once everyone knew where everyone else stood, they could settle down and worry about their own business. Relations went from hot to cool and even started to warm the other way. There was more trade, more international ventures, and more support between the two when either one was invaded by neighbors they still hated. The more prudent looked forward to a friendlier new age."
"That's when the earthquakes and floods began. The tornadoes came next. Rains of fire and poison emptied cities overnight. The gods by whom they had sworn inflicted the punishment they deserved for breaking their oaths. Within a year, neither Foirely nor Storoddia any longer existed. Their lands were taken by countries that kept their word when it was given. So remember, nephew. Either you must reconcile with Beuric or be his enemy, but I don't want to hear any of theses wishy-washy claims that will be retracted an hour later. Understand?"
Shaedri nodded, which did not at all mean he truly understood. That was not too blameworthy, given his age.
Finis