The Qualifications for Alternative History

The Nazis won or will win World War II, although it can be World War I or IV if you want.

The Qualifications for Fantasy

You can't call it psionics.

The Qualifications for Science Fiction

What happens if a scifi writer is a little too accurate? Is he drummed out of the fiction industry? Does he have to write for James Bond movies?

Addendum

Firewright
Icewright
Dreamwright
Rightwright (this is a paladin)

Suffix Huffix

I don't know what a huffix is, but when you're attaching -mancer to things, don't forget about -urgist, not to mention -er, -or, and -wright.

Science Fiction Review

Quick! Look through your scifi collection to find out which authors predicted AI would be used to make current and former presidents argue. Those are the only ones worth reading.

They Want Your Measurable Engagement

Don't click on clickbait. Don't give hits to hit pieces. Don't whine about Wired. Just ignore it. It's all a trick.

How to Liven Up Your Boring Fantasy Story

A miniboss in every chapter. If you're story isn't boring, you aren't allowed to read this, by the way. You already did? That's a fine, I'm afraid.

An Inviting Secret Club

All the cool writers are using "ensconce" these days. Tell everybody.

Spring Is Almost Here

But don't set your story then. It isn't nearly an edgy enough season. Summer and winter are the good ones. Fall is for babies and talking about your feelings.

Sequel Series Corner

Q. I want to write a sequel series to a completed stories. How many years in-universe should I let pass?
A. Two hundred thousand.
Q. I sort of thought I would be bringing back some of the old characters.
A. As spirits possessing comic relief mascots who reveal their true nature at a moment of crisis.
Q. All of them?
A. One of them. The rest will be replaced by different people who look, talk, and act the same but have different names.
Q. The one holdover will get pretty lonely.
A. "X, you remind me of someone I used to know." Done!

The Tube

The claims of New Paradise to be at last the perfect land mankind had yearned to reach but had never before done outside of myth had a great amount of factual support. Metro GDP, commute times, unemployment homelessness, education outcomes, homicide rate (0.2 per 100,000), reported happiness; every measurable category put it in the top five cities in the world, and when considered together none could top it.
Yet Percy had always doubted it. Starting with his name, which seemed impossible in a true utopia, but stretching to the fake-looking smiles, the endless friendly chatter on inconsequential topics, the complete lack of swearing, the looming threat of the Tube, everything about New Paradise defied the human condition. He could not believe it, he did not believe it, and at least he did something about it.
The authorities treated him kindly, of course. They seemed more upset about the situation than he was. "Come now, Percy," they said. "You don't want to go down the Tube. We're all waiting for you to smarten up." But he was resolute. He had found his path.
With sighs and even some tears, though not from him, the condemned man was escorted in front of lamenting onlookers to the Tube. Guards opened the hatch, two keys being required simultaneously, and closed it again behind Percy. The mayor pressed the button, and with a phwump, the malcontent was gone.
At last Percy would find out the secret of the Tube and what lay behind the city's glamorous facade. So he believed as he shot along miles and miles of clear plastic tubing above roads and confused cows. Finally the Tube shot him out, and after taking a moment to recover from the unusual trip, he took stock of his surroundings.
"Huh," he said. It was Crown Douglas, the second-most idyllic city in the world. He found out later it had a Tube as well.
Finis

Sword and Sorcery

Polearm and Politics
Cannon and Cathedrals
Rifle and Ribaldry
Catapult and Castle
Dagger and Daiquiri
Crossbow and Cross Stitch

On Book Numbering

Make sure to number the first book in a series "001" so everyone knows you're confident in it.

Spicing It Up

To change things up in your fantasy story, go through and change "wielded" to "manipulated." Then change them all back before anyone finds out what you did.

Addendum

By good reason, I mean the villain is looking for some ancient artifact that will make him absolutely shredded. Whether he gets it and the hero has to fight him at full power, the hero gets it, or some underling gets it to become the true main villain I leave up to you.

Physique Reminder

Unless you have a good reason to against this, your story's villain should be absolutely shredded, just an unbelievable specimen of musculature. This is true in all speculative fiction genres including alternative history.

Adaptation Corner

Q. What genre of videogame should the Recluce books be used in?
A. Shop sim.
Q. What about The Dark Is Rising?
A. 3v3 tag fighter.

The Obligation of History

Once upon a time, when the demon's power and influence seemed too strong for anyone to bear, a hero gripped the radiant sword forged in the strange country where earth and non-earth meet. Manifold dangers he overcame by his will and his tireless arm till at last even the demon fell. The people rejoiced and vowed forever to remember the name of . . .
The court historian's pen paused. "What was that name again?"
"Craddy. I don't think it's so hard to remember." The hero Craddy's feet kicked below his chair.
"None of that," the court sculptor chided.
"Craddy. That just doesn't do it for me." The historian licked his pen. "I have it. 'The name of Kemesh.' That sounds more heroic."
Craddy's morose expression drew another rebuke from the sculptor, but there was meaning behind it. "You can think it sounds like anything you want, but the sword magic I learned in the sacred land cannot be invoked without my name, by the oath sworn on the unseen mountain which no man may reach but one. I'm talking about myself here."
"You do like to do that, yes."
Even a hero could become irritated. "You asked. I'm giving you an exclusive scoop here as a reward for everything your kingdom did to help me."
"Yes, yes, we're ever so grateful, Kemesh."
And generations later, when a different kingdom conquered the world using overwhelming sword magic, none knew whence came the name they used to invoke it or why Kemesh's legacy availed nothing.
Finis

Science Fiction Society Discussion

Will poetry come back in the future? Almost certainly not. Unless the authoritarian government bans most kinds of music including the ones with lyrics! Bam! Science fiction is saved. There's some good stagnationcore right there. That future society can't even pilot mechs with music. They'll be sitting ducks for any aliens.

The Unsolved Problem

In those multipilot mechs, what do the other pilots do? Dai-Guard had an answer for that, but most of the time, the show just uses those characters for episode plots like when one of them quits the team. Plus! It seems like two-seaters should be common, but that's so only in Super Robot Wars.

Exploring Mythology

Did you know there were these dudes that had 100 hands? That's too many. In your next fantasy story, or scifi if it involves extensive bodily modification, eight hands will do.

The Cost of Innovation

The problem with stagnationcore is that embracing it violates the very principles of stagnation that undergird it. By problem, of course, I mean "artistic frisson."

The Newest Science Fiction Subgenre

It's the future, but everything's the same. I call it stagnationcore. Get in on the ground floor!

The Danger of Prophecy

The heroes burst through the portal leading to the inner sanctum, but too late. The ritual to restore the Betrayed God Chozka had been completed. "Now is the time for my vengeance against those who turned against me." The pillar of whirling darkness resolved into a form indescribable in human speech.
"They're all dead though," the heroes said.
"Yeah, that's true," agreed the dark priests. "It's been a long time."
"Oh." The power of the god that made all tremble retracted. "It gratifies me to hear that. Now is the time for me again to bless this planet and all its living creatures. What are the best oracles nowadays?"
One of the dark priests pointed at the heroes. "There's a prophecy from a thousand years ago predicting these meddlers. That's the last one we have."
"How negligent. Now is the time for me to start up a new location. You're all hired."
Thus were oracular pronouncements returned to the world, and everyone made so much money they no longer wanted to destroy all humanity or break into houses to open treasure chests. Moreover, the god remembered to use some of that money to hire security in case anyone got mad about the predictions the way they did millennia earlier.
Finis

Be Careful With Names

Watch out for how your readers will interpret names. For instance, if your character Mandy Core doesn't turn into either a manticore or a giant space complex the heroic spaceship has to destroy, people will be disappointed. To fix this, have one of those two things happen.

Addendum

And make sure they take their shoes off frequently for cultural reasons! Or never wear them at all! Aaaaaaaahhh!

Attracting a Wider Audience

Be sure to describe the feet of all the characters in your story. Don't ask why. Just do it.

Innovation Station

Number your chapters backwards so the story counts down to the conclusion. This might not work very well if the last chapter is a summing up, what happened after kind of thing, though there's always Chapter 0 for those instances.