Nintendo Direct Reflection

When one is reminded that Nintendo is making Splatoon, one is compelled to consider where today's popular fantasy and science fiction ideas originate. Do books have any influence, or are they just like TV shows that have lower viewership than mid-tier Youtube channels?

Adaptation Corner

For an Ethshar video game, let's see, I think a Majesty-type game would work. Oh, you want it to be successful? Extraction shooter. What do you mean, you were serious about wanting it to be a successful new game? Nobody makes those nowadays. All right, fine, open-world game with Arkham Asylum combat it is.

Addendum

But then when you try to claim your coupon, you have to answer some questions about the book. The answers are changed regularly for security reasons. This process may sound like a hassle, but do you want people to read more or not? What do you mean, "not particularly?" Well, yeah, I guess, when you put it that way.

Encouraging More People to Read

Coupons! For eggs! Inserted right in the book.

Summary of the Blastopolitan Saga

For his crimes—saying what he thought and living how he liked—he was given a harsh sentence. He was . . .

EXILED TO BLASTOPOLIS

"I still can't believe I was exiled to Blastopolis, but I'm settling in," said Gilliam Axhagen as he potshotted another astro-mutant with his tri-fission blaster. "Say, what's that building over there, the one they're staying away from? It looks abandoned—just the sort of place they usually like. Could that be the location of one of the . . ."

SECRETS OF BLASTOPOLIS

"We've uncovered some of the secrets of Blastopolis." Fred Wendell laid a paternal hand on Gilliam's shoulder. "But we won't be able to understand much more unless you become . . ."

RULER OF BLASTOPOLIS

"Now that there's a true ruler of Blastopolis, we can hope for some order," said Fender Bivins as he vaporized one of the last four remaining sludge-trudgers. "But who knows what could be out there, out . . ."

BEYOND BLASTOPOLIS

"It turns out readers don't much care what's beyond Blastopolis." The publisher laid a paternal hand on the writer's shoulder. "We really think it would be better to take things . . ."

BACK TO BLASTOPOLIS
TRIUMPH IN BLASTOPOLIS
WAR IN BLASTOPOLIS
SURVIVORS OF BLASTOPOLIS
EXCURSION BEYOND BLASTOPOLIS
RETURN TO BLASTOPOLIS
GENESIS OF BLASTOPOLIS
CANCELLATION OF BLASTOPOLIS
REVIVAL OF BLASTOPOLIS
Finis

Monster Popularity

Have slime monsters fallen out of favor now that we're all sure they're somebody's fetish? The question has two parts, the first being whether slimes have fallen out of favor, which itself requires determining how popular they ever were. The point isn't to get an asnwer. It's to start a conversation. Have you ever had someone tell you that, or "I'm just asking questions?" That person is lying to you. He is coming at you with an anti-slime agenda, or maybe a pro-slime agenda, I'm unsure, and you shouldn't fall for it.

A Contemptible Industry

Board games are released with all these chits and miniatures these days and we expect people to buy a book with no add-ons, not even a detachable map and character dossiers like G.I. Joe. No wonder the people have given up on literacy.

Addendum

On another note, how many Christmas spaceships have you seen? Looks like fantasy wins again, losers!

Addendum

As for alternate history, I'm not sure that actually exists in our timeline, probably because the Battle of Stamford Bridge turned out the way it did. I don't need to tell you the outcome, same-timeline buddies. Obviously someone whose name begins with "Har" won.

State of Speculative Fiction

Naive portrayals of honorable warrior races have fallen out of favor. That's why nobody likes science fiction anymore. Fantasy is hanging in solely on the double back of thinly disguised erotic fiction (the thinner the better).

Video Game Retrospective

Looking back on it, the Quest for Glory games would have sold double if not quadruple had they been called Quest for Virtue, Quest for Goodness, or Quest for Justice. Did they think they were selling games to vikings or something? To Mycenaean-age Greeks?

Addendum

Just because something doesn't get much current discussion doesn't mean it can't curse you. This is general life advice.

Ancient Fashion

People used to talk about pyramids all the time. They wouldn't shut up. Then they stopped, but then they started again, but now nobody talks about pyramids. Don't be fooled, though. They still visit the silly things. From this I conclude the popularity of pyramids is perennial. The lesson here is that fashion applies to fashion itself; pyramids are fashionable, but talking about how fashionable they are is not. Sometimes Stonehenge is on top, sometimes this, sometimes that. As for the significance, I dunno. Keep it in mind. Someday the rewards could be staggering.

Big News!

People are still reading fantasy! I'm not sure they should, though. We should be living it by now. Does anyone think the major governments of the world don't control portals into other realms full of magic and exotic materials? That's why they aren't building cooler tanks.

The Dominance of Fantasy

Over the years, fantasy has overtaken science fiction in the speculative fiction field as far as popularity acclaim. The reason for this is simple: We're closer to the future. There isn't as much future fiction left. We're going to run out approximately 2082 at this rate, so find a real job, science fiction idiots.

Turning Your Series Around

Instead of calling your show The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power Season 2 and The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power Season 3, call it Rings of Wisdom and Rings of Courage, and also put out a breakfast cereal based on it. People don't have to watch your show, but they do have to eat.

Restraint Is Overrated

Right now you're probably thinking, "I can't call something in my story a dragodrake. That's just silly." In two years, somebody's going to do just that and sell six million copies. Restraint is cowardice dressed up real nice.

Ultima Lore Question

Why didn't the Avatar just call the Guardian "The Fartian" in public? He would have gotten everyone on his side. Also, what kind of villain is a big face? How did he even get followers? At least Andross was a genius scientist, and yes, I am saying Star Fox has a better story than Ultima VII.

Addender

Everything will be more popular than ever. Because there will be more people. That may sound obvious, but do you think it is?

How to Get Fantasy Movies in the Theaters

All-animal casts. Sure, you lose something as far as dialogue, but when that husky swears the third oath or whatever, nobody in the audience will be silent.