The Extensive Limits of Mockery

The rebels smashed down the door, and their leader urged them forward. "Today, brothers, is the last we are deprived of our liberty! What can the tyrant do to us now?"
"Only this," the tyrant himself said. He strode toward the rebels, awe-inspiring in his cavalier attitude. He stopped but a foot from the leader and spoke. "Liberty shmiberty."
The rebels were amazed, struck dumb by his eloquence. "Retreat!" was all their leader managed to shout and all his followers could do.
As the tyrant turned to look for someone he could order to get a new door, a crowd came to it. "Master, a petition!" The man who presented it on behalf of every merchant in the country bowed in a servile enough fashion, but his hands were steady.
"You think your taxes are too high, eh? Taxes, shmaxes."
"I suppose you're right, master." The merchants withdrew, abashed.
The tyrant turned again, only to be halted again by the shouts of angry teens. Groaning, he gave them a minute of his time.
An athletic youth walked forward with a pugnacious look. "Hey man, what's the deal with banning our shindigs? There's nothing political about them, honest."
"Shindig . . . shindig . . . Argh!"
Thus did callow teenagers take over the government.
Finis

The Undercard Was Better

Window Wizard and Number Wizard faced each other across the green. Only a few spectators had dropped by even though the duel had been advertised pretty well.
"You have no chance, Number Wizard. My magic is too strong and big."
"So what? My magic is many and opaque."
The rivals made those and many other boasts. The crowd, if it could be called that, which it could not, but the duke insisted, grumbled.
"When are they going to fight?"
"They're Number Wizard and Window Wizard, so just putting out an estimate here, never."
"Why did the duke set this up, then?"
Meanwhile, at the ducal palace, its lord reviewed his resources. "Once numbers go out the window, I can challenge the king. Ha. Haha. Mwahahaha!" If only he had paid more attention to his studies, he would have known wizardry did not work the way he wanted. Stay in school, everyone, and those of you long out of it, keep on learning in your free time.
Finis

The Tube

The claims of New Paradise to be at last the perfect land mankind had yearned to reach but had never before done outside of myth had a great amount of factual support. Metro GDP, commute times, unemployment homelessness, education outcomes, homicide rate (0.2 per 100,000), reported happiness; every measurable category put it in the top five cities in the world, and when considered together none could top it.
Yet Percy had always doubted it. Starting with his name, which seemed impossible in a true utopia, but stretching to the fake-looking smiles, the endless friendly chatter on inconsequential topics, the complete lack of swearing, the looming threat of the Tube, everything about New Paradise defied the human condition. He could not believe it, he did not believe it, and at least he did something about it.
The authorities treated him kindly, of course. They seemed more upset about the situation than he was. "Come now, Percy," they said. "You don't want to go down the Tube. We're all waiting for you to smarten up." But he was resolute. He had found his path.
With sighs and even some tears, though not from him, the condemned man was escorted in front of lamenting onlookers to the Tube. Guards opened the hatch, two keys being required simultaneously, and closed it again behind Percy. The mayor pressed the button, and with a phwump, the malcontent was gone.
At last Percy would find out the secret of the Tube and what lay behind the city's glamorous facade. So he believed as he shot along miles and miles of clear plastic tubing above roads and confused cows. Finally the Tube shot him out, and after taking a moment to recover from the unusual trip, he took stock of his surroundings.
"Huh," he said. It was Crown Douglas, the second-most idyllic city in the world. He found out later it had a Tube as well.
Finis