Elevation Derivation

In order to figure out whether magic works better at high or low altitudes, you'll have to figure out if magic comes from the earth's core or the moon. Obviously it's going to come from both, right? But then you have to decide whether your main character wields both or neither, and that's going to depend on countless factors such as your mood. Actually that's the only one.

Addendum

Obviously the surface will be coated with glue so the aliens get stuck when they land, but much also will be written of the Mousetraps of Mars.

The Ultimate Fate of Mars

Sorry Mars, but we're going to have to turn you into a fake Earth so that aliens will attack that one instead. I'm sure you understand.

Upcoming Job Opportunities

Soon we'll all have productive work throwing pails of water on people to simulate rain in ships and colonies so that we don't succumb to space madness. Innovators will get ahead by finding ways to get people to sneeze during terrestrial allergy season and rig sirens to play during simulated night.

Addender

The aliens will live in different regions of the same planets. Thus will coexistence flourish, and when plagues break out, each species will bring in doctors and nurses from an immune species.

Addendum

The same won't be true of the other planets we will undoubtedly colonize because far smaller regions will be inhabited. When you can pick and choose the best places, you don't want to leave anyway.

Earth's Future

Canals everywhere. Every continent divided into even grids by canals. Cars: Obsolete. Trains: Obsolete. Planes: Rigged for water landings. Bicycles: Retained for health reasons only. Motorcycles: I'm pretty sure they're used to annoy everybody even today, so nothing will change there.

Geographical Realizations

Earth's world serpent should be located southerly for efficiency, so how did the Norse find out about it? Does it look like a big W from space?

An Alternate Earth

What if the land were sea and the sea land? Not enough water, for one thing. The Panama Bridge would still be pretty good.

Miltary Rank Q&A

Q. What about the lower ranks?
A. Oh no! I forgot!

A Fictional Rank Structure

Sometimes our ranks of today sound too Earth-centric and too, quite frankly, French. Try this arrangement instead.

Major
More Major
Big Major
Bigger Major
Biggest Major
Major Mostest

The Three Science Fiction Subgenres

1) Earth is doing great.
2) Earth isn't doing too hot.
3) Earth?

The Problem With Fantasy Today

Are those personality quizzes like what house you would be in or what element you would be still around? Those were great advertising.

Trivia Corner

A Lord of the Rings prequel is in produciton, but did you know that every single story that takes place on Earth is a Lord of the Rings sequel?

An Inescapable Truth

"Satellites in position. Camera drones out. Seismographs sited. Barometers, radiometers, chronometers all set. We're ready when you are."
The ramp lowered, and the best environment suit modern engineering could devise walked from the ship to the barren, inhospitable world that had never known moisture, let alone daisies. The chosen explorer reached the bottom, and then he was in a land of greenery and gentle inclines.
"Earthification complete. Looks like you're somewhere in Belgium. Get back in. I just hope we have enough data to figure out something about when and why this keeps happening."
"We already know," the explorer said as he returned. "Space is dumb and fake."
Finis