Visions of Future Anarchy

The first cruel robber asked travelers for the time. When they looked at their watches, he grabbed their feet and swung them against a tree. Knowing that, the hero approached him.
"Excuse me, sir. Do you know what time it is?"
"No, but you can look at my watch. I wear it around my ankle."
"Eh?"
Pow! The hero kicked the bandit against the tree and killed him.
The second cruel robber invited travelers to rest in a cottage. When polite visitors removed their shoes and stepped inside, the treacherous floor dropped them into a boiling cauldron. Knowing that, the hero approached him.
"Excuse me, sir. You look like someone who needs a break."
"Thank you. I'll just take off my boots."
"Eh?"
Entranced by the valuable watch, studded with gems but nevertheless tasteful, the robber failed to resist in time and was thrown into his own trap. Splash!
The third cruel robber gave travelers a remote control and suggested they watch their favorite program on his gigantic television set. Too bad for them, the remote was a bomb. Knowing that, the hero approached him.
"Excuse me, sir. Why not sit down on this couch and watch your favorite program?"
"It isn't on yet. Here, check this watch."
"And a fine watch that is. I bet it could bring . . . eh?"
Smash! The hero brought the TV down on the robber's head. With that, the road was safe at last.
Finis

Something Less Cool in Science Fiction

Implants. Some stories figure everyone will want all their technology in implant form, but instead we invented smartphones and tablets to get watches even farther away from our skin.

Trends and Philosophy

I was checking to see if sonicwasnevergood.com was available when disquieting thoughts attacked me. Is Sonic a hero who seems edgy but isn't? He certainly isn't edgy, but does he seem edgy? He certainly has a lot of spikes. Quills. Whatever. And yet, he's a pudgy little guy who looks at his watch all the time. Bankers and railroad personnel aren't edgy.
I don't think anyone today would call Sonic edgy, but maybe that's the highest form of seeming to be edgy but not being so. His true nature shines forth with such strength as to blind us to his spikes and his speed, the special ability of choice for edgelords everywhere.