Deserving Inheritors and the Way of the World

His patience exhausted, the god stretched forth his hand. "Go, herald, and search among the people. Should you fail to find three who do not adopt a cutesy voice when talking to pets, I will purge the world of life and begin anew."
The herald went. Months later, he returned.
"I have found three such. They are, however, kind of mean."
The god nodded. "The world they have preserved by their high character therefore will belong to them. Long will be the reign of people who are kind of jerks but they could be worse."
Thus it stands today.
Finis

Numismamonstra

When the leading men of Terschyria invited at public expense Gallos, a man renowned for his insight, it was not without hope of benefiting from the visit. They put to him the following question.
"The king's death has left us without any heir, even disputed. Neither does tradition present a clear procedure for this case. How ought we to decide who shall rule us? Tell us and be rewarded."
Gallos pondered the matter. He said this at last. "This is a simple matter, but as for the rewards, it must be in coins minted after the king's death. Show me those and you will have your answer."
The leading men relied on his reputation and had it done without demur. Soon they conveyed to Gallos a plate covered in new coins. He picked up one, satisfied himself with an inspection, and tossed it back.
"Turn over the coins and behold your new king!"
"What is this? Is this not a portrait of Lundaros the quarry owner?" The men looked through the coins and marveled. "And on each and every one. Certainly he is respected, able in his affairs, and unknown to scandal."
"It that is he, then go find him! I know nothing of it. But did you imagine that the god to whom the inscription on the obverse entrusts the kingdom's welfare is indifferent to you? That is impossible, and for my reward I will take a single coin as proof that the signs of beneficence are everywhere, when we remember to look at them!"
Finis

Addendum

If you reach the god retirement planet yourself, you can see a miracle. The miracle is that you are asked to leave rather than being killed right off the bat.

Speaking of Gods

Do you think gods use all those offerings they got to build a mansion on a way cooler planet? I bet that's true. It's why you don't see Zeus hanging out at the mall these days. Imagine that malls weren't dead for this thought experiment.

The Godless City

To remind all men that fortune is never constant, a storm afflicted the victors of the great naval battle so that within an hour they might have wished to have lost it instead that retreat could save them. Of one ship tossed far and then low, sinking, an officer and a portion of his soldiers made the shore.
The officer declared it a miracle and vowed to give offerings to the god who preserved them, and if there was no shrine for the purpose already, he would have one made, and the same for a temple when his means permitted. He encouraged his men to join him in that. "Certainly, but what god is it?" they asked.
The plain and uninhabited shore gave no answer to that. Stymied, the officer led his men away from there and succeeded so well that not a single one of them died before seeing home or whatever other destination he liked.
That duty done, the officer turned to the other, and in furtherance of it he settled a colony where he washed up. It flourished, whereupon the founder attracted scholars and philosophers whom he tasked with determining the god in addition to their other studies.
It flourished still more and soon became prosperous enough that its founder had erected the grandest temple known, though he refused to have it consecrated before his rescuer was known. More than that, he forbade the building of any other temple within the city limits before then. The injunction is observed today. Therefore, stranger, to answer your question at last, your devotions must be done outside the walls.
Finis

A Lamentable Rejection

The officials presented their recommendation. While both plans for the new palace appeared to them both feasible and admirable, one far exceeded the other in excellence.
"Then we shall have the worse one."
The decision befuddled the officials involved, those not involved, and the entire cloud of courtiers and functionaries, to say nothing of the architects themselves, who had been permitted to hear the conference. Perceiving the sovereign to be in a calm and even mood, the officials begged for a few more words that they might understand the decision.
The emperor made them be silent. "Say nothing more about it. We have our instructions. The creator of the better plans, is he here? He is to leave, unaccompanied."
The sovereigns' words added to the general bafflement, but what could be done? The officials bowed and the discouraged architect backed out of the audience chamber. Downcast as he was, he did not notice, standing before the great portal to the palace, the herald of the great god, not till that luminary spoke.
"You, architect. You are recommended by the only human we heed as the candidate best suited for the work. Come with me now to beginning planning the new heaven." Saying that, the architect was taken away, and when he returned, he held wondrous treasures.
Finis

Addendum

Deciduous tree monsters look like warriors in summer and wizards in winter, but they're actually rogues. They're just limited in their opportunities.

Nuances of Fantasy Professions

I bet successful lumberjacks are both educated and canny beyond most, what with all those dryads and forest spirits and whatnot that can cause them trouble. If there are outright tree monsters, the lumberjacks must be powerful champions as well.

Addendum

That old sailor is a sea god, but you won't find that out for a few books, or maybe in an interview.

Addendum

The secret is that I just wanted to roll out "thaumatocracy."

Against Thaumatocracy

Given that being capable of magic is better than being incapable, what are some reasons mages might not be in charge?

- There aren't enough of them
-- It requires innate talent which few have
-- It takes too long to learn
-- They keep dying
-- Numbers are limited by the need for some external resource. For example a mage has to bathe in dragon's blood or make a contract with a manticore
- There are too many of them. Being a mage isn't a big deal, and hiring some is less of one.
- Magic isn't that good
- The kinds of people who learn magic are bad at maintaining political power
-- They're too busy with magical studies
-- Magic is linked to certain characteristics such as lack of ambition or gullibility
-- Magic alters mages, for example removing the need for food and replacing it with an insatiable urge to visit places of power
-- Magical expenditure requires long periods of isolation or hibernation
- The kinds of people who learn magic don't want to maintain political power
-- Magical talent isn't hereditary. Ensuring your family will be passed over for some genius discovered in a village is distasteful.
- The kinds of people who learn magic can't maintain political power
-- The gods who give them power forbid it
-- The terms of their contracts forbid it
-- The dragons who rule the world forbid it, and they do check regularly
-- Magic circulates through the bonds between people, so that the more subordinates one has, the more his magic is divided among them - The rulers are capable of preventing it
-- They aren't mages, but they have magic
--- Divine sanction
--- The approval of the land itself
--- Contracts with manticores
--- A store of artifacts
--- Hereditary talents
--- They're the source of magic
-- They're above magic
--- Gods rule directly
--- Dragons/manticores/basilisks etc. rule directly
--- Aliens rule directly (they came to research magic)

There are a few reasons. As for how mages might become an oppressed minority, they can't, cut that out, your allegory stinks.

The Road to Stellar Damascus

"Sir, we landed on the planet for the initial exploration."
"Then why are you here?"
"We saw a man, sir. A human. He told us this. 'Every sun is a god. Worship ours and you will be permitted to live on the surface. To abstain and remain in your generational colony ship, that is permitted as well.'"
"What's this you're telling me?"
"The others will tell you the same, sir. I attempted to initiate diplomacy, but I fell asleep. I woke up on the flight back."
"Absurd."
The captain personally led the second expedition and came back the first priest, and as for the colonists, they learned there was more to space than they dreamed.
Finis

The Three Ages of Man

"I will make men of gold," the first god declared, "beautiful and immune to corruption."
"I will make men of iron," the second god declared, "strong and hard, impervious to the attacks of beasts."
"I will make men of a bunch of stuff I grabbed," the third god declared.
"What's the advantage of that?" the others asked.
"I've got a hundred out already while you two are working on your first. Watch out there, pal! Can't have the eyes be different sizes! My people have already overrun the world, but keep working on it."
Therefore we await the advent of the men of gold and the men of iron, because they will probably be helpful to us, the rulers of everything beneath heaven, when finally they come.
Finis

Q&A Corner

Q. How do I get across that my setting is full of magic and grand deeds?
A. Slivers of dead gods are a standard currency.
Q. How do I get across that my setting has dragons in it?
A. Here's the first line: "That was the day I saw a dragon."
Q. How do I get across that my orcs are noble and cool and stuff?
A. Here's the title: Neo-Fantasy Is All Out of Ideas
Q. What comes after neo-fantasy?
A. Rachet fantasy, then palin-fantasy, then intimate fantasy (intasy), then tidal fantasy.

Somebody Gets Eaten by a [ANIMAL] and There Are People and Such Inside

Traditionally it's a whale, going back to ya boy Lucian, but don't forget about elephants, rocs, dragons, and gods. That last one kind of happens in the Mahabharata, but that doesn't mean we can't rip it off. I like the elephant one the most aesthetically, but rocs have the most story convenience. Because of the travel, you see.

A Story of Shapes

Once, a traveler became lost in a land in which he had never before gone astray. The reason was the mist, thick, cold, and obscuring, unusual in that time of drought. He wandered until the mist began to clear and saw himself to be in a place he had not before visited, away from the road and ringed with rocks, and in the center, a figure, dim at first but gradually visible.
The man was waving around a sack, and not without effect, for the mist went into the sack and caused it to bulge. Little by little, all of it was drawn in so that the day was as clear as could be.
"What is that sack, good sir?" the traveler asked. "And what is your name?"
The sack-swinger stopped and saw the traveler for the first time. "Oh, it's a shame you saw that, it is. Now you must press the mist in this bag." So saying, he threw the sack on the ground and menaced the traveler until the job was done.
"Good. Now you must roll out the mist and make the edges even." The traveler did that as well. The mist made a large, gray sheet, and though its borders lacked definition, the traveler was able to tell where they should be.
"Good. Now carve apart the mist into sections." Seeing the traveler unsure whether to speak, the man went on to say, "The size is your choice, and up to you also is the shape, and whether to make them uniform."
The traveler made them blocks at first, but as he went he made circles and spirals and petals, and other shapes as well, some of them small and others nearly the whole length of it. More than that, his confidence increased so that he packed some together and pulled others apart as it felt right to do. When he completed his work, the man looked it over.
"At last, something I can use. I'll end the drought with this, and as for you." The man made the mist into the clouds and the traveler into the god of them, and from then on the world had weather again.
Finis

The Difficulty of Circumstances

"You have nothing to live for, you say? Well then. Try this. There is a barrel in the town of Tenba which has this property. Reach in it, once only, and you can pull out any object you want. That's right, it grants your wish, if you wish for something tangible."
Believing in those words, for he could believe in nothing else, the despondent swordsman traveled across the lands, and though he did not remember a deed he did, the people were everywhere grateful for his intervention.
He reached Tenba and found the barrel. Every man in the town knew the legend and knew it to be true, and directed him straight to it. "But you will not put your hand in," they told him.
He learned the reason when he saw the guardian. Before the barrel, radiant and unquestionable no common item, stood on its hind legs a bear wearing big, bulky red gloves. It stared into nothing until he approached, whereupon it gave him its attention and raised its gloves. Unsure, he took a step back, and the guardian bear resumed its idle attitude.
"The story is this." It was the white-haired man who told him of the barrel to begin who said that, and how he arrived there in time for an explanation would have bewildered someone not already confused by the bear. "A god placed that barrel there and set over it the guardian, saying this: 'Fulfill your desires if you can, but remember that whatever happens, good or bad, there is something behind it, and your desires can change easily enough.' Now you may kill yourself with the guardian as your excuse. I think first you should consider my advice from back then."
With that, the man disappeared, and the swordsman reflected.
Finis

The Agonizing Debt of Sin

The prophet proclaimed, "The gods are angry with us!"
The skeptic confronted him. "What makes you say so this time? Not enough rain? Too much rain? Or is it OW! What was that?"
"Behold and marvel! The gods have descended to slap everyone individually! It is a sublime honor, but OUCH!"
After that, the skeptic became a prophet himself, as did every person in the entire world. That time is today known as The Year of Prophets, and never will there be such a year again, though we beg every day for the gods to stop being so coy about what we should and should not do.
Finis

Starter Town Fair

Hello there! It's a great time to visit, because our town fair begins today. It doesn't have anything to do with gods, heroes, or curses. In reality it's nothing but a big advertisement where we show off the quality of what we're producing this year. Still, we can't help but feel proud of our town when we look back on what we've made and what we've overcome.
Just look at what our gem cutters have done with the items our miners bring out when the mines aren't overrun by monsters, which is most of the year you know. That purity! That shine! That taste in settings! I can see you're entranced, and I don't blame you. I'm gratified by it, and so is everyone else in town.
Over there is the display of what our furriers have designated as their finest pieces yet to be shipped out. They're a local specialty; we get the pelts from the Fierce Wolves adventurers grind all day. You probably passed some on your way into town. Remember, no kill-stealing!
Has your eye been taken by that bronze of the twin gods of medicine and poison? It isn't a permanent fixture. The item store had it made out of the proceeds from potions and antidotes. Business is booming, isn't it? But not as much as for our favorite (and richest) private citizen, who funded the new town hall. He makes the treasure chests you see in every dungeon.
What's that cage for, you ask? I'm glad you asked. That's one of our most fun town traditions. You see, every year some daring thief tries to make off with, well, just look around! That isn't planned. It's just a consequence of human nature. Then we grab the thief and throw him in there. That's where we've been going this whole time! Enjoy your stay, and if you're lucky, a hero will come by who's willing to give you a second chance. Don't look like that. It happens more often than you'd think, because of the mines.
Finis

Important Science Question

Does each asteroid have its own god, or is there a single asteroid belt god?