Addendum

The only alternative is that ghosts are actually aliens and people just didn't know about space. While that's almost certainly true, supporing novel theories is the way to get ahead. It's not as if I'll endure any penalties if I'm wrong. The papers will have already been published and the citations counted.

October Update

Anybody been spooked to death yet? I'm hoping to confirm my theory that ghosts read blogs all day which is why everyone started reporting alien sightings instead (they can't be entertained by anything short of a cat video).

Marchuary

We call it March because it's time to get going. To space. Let's build a space elevator. Come on. We can't have a murder on the space elevator until we have the space elevator.

The Character of February

Short and cold. Does Valentine's Day fit in here? It does not. Maybe that was when he died or was born or decided to throw a party, but let's pick one of the other ones and move this over to May-July. To fill the gap, we'll have a day to celebrate the imminent end of February, on the 25th or thereabouts.

The Spirit of the Month

It's January, and you know what that means. You have to describe a scene depicted on a door in the story you're writing. It doesn't have to be relevant to the plot, themes, or setting of the story so long as it gets the reader to imagine your characters standing there for an hour looking at it while the page tries to shove them in to see the king or whatever.

September Warning

There isn't much of it left, so finish up anything that's left. September swimming, September sweeping, September sedition, September sermonizing, September sorting of stamps and stickers, any of it. Except that middle one.

Proposal: Halloween 2

Halloween is fine for autumn-type horror, but what about the spring-summer type? Voracious sharks, rainstorms which force you to take refuge in a spooky house, and being shipwrecked on a remote island on which people hunt you for sport? April, May, and June don't have a whole lot going on.

Capitalization Condemnation

Title capitalization. It's stupid. "Of" and "and" are crucial words! Why shouldn't we capitalize them? Just capitalize everything. That's the better way. I may have said this before. Maybe I should make it a monthly post. Hourly? That's how things get done.

February Club

Who's making every month in the fantasy setting twenty-eight days and just not telling the readers? Feels good, doesn't it? Kind of scandalous. A little bit of intrigue, you know, some mystery.

Addendum

They're gonna need new months! They're gonna have New November and July Alternative!

Mayvember Is the Month for Spooky Merriment

"Think we'll get a lot of scares, Durg?"
"Doubt it, Gevins. Mayvember is here, so everybody's steeled against it." Durg set about securing the connections between the two halves of the dragon costume. "But we'll scare the people who are ready to be scared, and they're the ones who matter. There."
But what was this? The joined costume fused together and absorbed the two young men wearing it by Mayvember magic! This was the birth of the invincible hero, Draconic King Gevidax!
"What's happening, Gevins?"
"I don't know, Durg! It feels like I've . . . like we've become a real dragon! Maybe we'll scarea few more than we thought."
Gevins and Durg mastered Gevidax's basic movement just in time, for when they returned to their village, the scaring had already begun! But not harmless Mayvember pranks. It was Ur-Sphinx Keptet that attacked! Fight, Gevidax! Rake the enemy, Dragon Claw! Roast him, Dragon Blast! The world's peace is yours to protect. Heaven's Anger Wyrm Sword!
Finis

Addendum

In Juneuary all sins are forgiven, but only if you make it that far. So try not to be murdered by Mayvember wildmen.

Happy Spooky Mayvember

People don't know about Spooky Mayvember, but they don't know ghosts are real, either. To say nothing of the vampiroids. Celebrate with some, I don't know, eat some flowers or something. Everybody's just killing until Juneuary anyway.

A Fantasy-Based Proposal

Let's change February to Feb'uary. That R isn't doing anything anyway.

Happy December

December facts:

1. This month is named after a dragon named Ecembe.
2. Snow.
3. Some think this is the tenth month of the year. They are correct.
4. The authorities use the lie of twelve months to create extra centuries of history filled with propaganda.
5. December is one of the best months for a murder mystery. June is good as well.
6. The weapon of December is the fusion beam.