Social Events?

I've never attended one myself, but sometimes your characters might have to. Should such a dreadful eventuality arise, please consult the following table, your favorite chance-reflection implement at hand.

1. Wedding
2. Funeral
3. Baptism (local equivalent thereof)
4. Knighting
5. Measured observance of the outcome of a recent sporting event
6. Mass clemency offer on the ascension of a new ruler
7. THE GATHERING
8. Birth
9. A priest is gonna resurrect somebody? Don't see that every day!
10. Ritual bathing in the pool of the slain god to absorb powers (very likely the main character won't get any but then later it turns out he has the best one or can steal others or excels with wits or hard work, which is to say everyone else is incapable of figuring out how to open a door)
11. Important businessman's retirement
12. The sword dance (few survive the sword dance)

To determine who else will be attending the event, how about you come up with something on your own for a change? Sheesh.

A Shared Obligation

If your story doesn't have at least one made-up word in it, how can we make advancements in the language?

An Important Warning

How often should books remind the reader to rest his eyes, do his homework/chores/social climbing, and get around to setting up those cameras? Every fifteen pages?